“Your Damn yard Looks Like a Parking Lot”
“Your Damn yard looks like a parking lot!” Was the “welcome” I received from one of my new neighbors recently.
My wife and I downsized and moved to a smaller patio home neighborhood a few months back. Most of our neighbors are older than us, and none have kids at home (we have one still at home plus a college student). So, our neighbors have one or at the most 2-cars.
We have a minimum of 4-cars. So when friends or family come over, well…we have several cars in our driveway. Admittedly, there were a few times it was too many, and we moved to remedy the “crisis.”
When, I “engaged” my neighbor about his comment, his wife was quick to point out the real root of the problem. The issues brought up by several others: We are younger, we have kids, and the college student staying with us is black! OMG, the only black in the neighborhood!
“Ya’ll are not like us! Ya’ll are different, we just don’t do things like you do.”
Well, I had to try my best to tell my neighbors in “love” that …
I don’t give a flying rats rump if they think we are different, and I don’t care if you don’t like us having a black student (who is like our adopted daughter) here with us.
Lesson learned and to be taught…
Many times those doing things different than you, are actually doing it the right way!
What would you have said to the neighbor?
21 Responses to ““Your Damn yard Looks Like a Parking Lot””
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John Bates says: I’m usually not very good at responding at the moment I’m confronted like that. Or rather, I’m too good at it but my responses are usually ones I regret later so I try to control my cutting responses. I’d, unfortunately, have probably smiled and walked away and brooded until I could work my way around to a friendly version of “rats rump”. I’m also astounded (and I don’t know why I am) that having a black kid in a neighborhood is still a cause for shock and dismay.
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Yeah, all types of rude, narrowed minded and mean people still catch me off guard. But when it comes, it makes the hair on my neck stand up!
Larri SeamsInspired says: I would have said, “I’m sorry you feel that way.Thanks for bringing your point to my attention.”
There’s no validity in trying to have a discussion with someone who is that set in their ways. You just have to love them and pray they will one day be reconciled to Him so their hearts will change. I’ve been studying 2 Corinthians 5:14-21 this week. I’m reminded we are not to regard anyone from a worldly viewpoint. WE are the message of reconciliation. WE are Christ’s ambassadors. To love like Him is the only way to respond when faced with this kind of neighborly adversity.
Interesting post. Thanks for sharing. Happy Thursday! 
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True. Honestly, when dealing with people like that, I have the most difficulty in responding like Jesus. I’m more inclined to flog them into the Kingdom
Jenn says: I woud have asked if he needed a part time job as a valet driver. 
I live in the country. My dad had pines planted around the edge of his fields as wind breaks. Some of them started dying out last summer, so he cut them all down. You wouldn’t believe the number of neighbors that came to let him know he destroyed the look of the community by cutting down HIS trees. Just to say, there’s one in every bunch. Hope they get to know you better so they’ll know how wonderful you are.
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Thanks Jenn, I actually told them would love to have them over for dinner. The invite was ignored.
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tracy cook says:
what do you tell us…..dont quit inviting!!! even if they dont really want to come keep asking (they may even finally say yes just because they figure you wont stop asking until they do).
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Perhaps you should take a page from the Jeff Foxworthy playbook and inform your neighbor that criminals will assume that with all those cars you are a redneck. Rednecks own guns, therefore it is foolish to commit crime in a redneck neighborhood. So by having all those cars, you are deterring crime.
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Ha, didn’t think about that Mark. You have a great gift of putting a positive spin on a bad turn. Thanks!
Faye says: I would have told them to come visit Cornerstone. My Lord, they would pass straight out in there….double whammy…cars and blacks! Then what would make it worse, they’d see all ethnicities just loving & enjoying each other. But on a more serious note, this is just really sad. I feel sorry for them. You would think that in 2012, this type of attitude would not be so prevalent. But we had issues in our neighborhood as well. We were actually told that “….we want to make sure that no one is coming into the neighborhood picking things like a green or blue roof….” We were told that “…our neighborhood has always been quiet…” Someone actually called to purchase our land from us before we built. I had gotten so fed up by that time that I was just about willing to sell it to them. So for people like that, tell them there are plenty FOR SALE signs up on homes all around our city, yall are more than welcome to move….but we ain’ goin nowhere!!!
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You go girl. Neither are we. We know God gave us this new home just for us. If they don’t like us being here, they have 2-Choices… Move or die!
WILLIAM JOHNSON says: I don’t really know if I could have contained myself. I have dealt with some of the same issues in malls with my son, who is black, (I’m white) and I have found that just because I belong to God lock stock and barrel, I can’t fix stupid. When dealing with those folks I have a tendency to “brush the dust off my sandals” and let ‘em know they can’t be fixed.
Cindy says: “Look beyond their ignorance, and see their need.” Artie Davis (I think)
So sorry you had to have that happen in your new neighborhood. You all are a great family and they will see that for themselves soon enough.
Shan says: Not trying to go all old school on y’all but the Bible says ‘touch not my anointed’. Your family is definitely anointed of God so I would say your neighbor just spoke curses on his household 
Wow. I think I would have said, “just wait until they deliver my other three cars – I’m fixin’em up!” Then… walk away. The us versus them thing tends to burn up the Creator of all this diversity.
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I’m usually not very good at responding at the moment I’m confronted like that. Or rather, I’m too good at it but my responses are usually ones I regret later so I try to control my cutting responses. I’d, unfortunately, have probably smiled and walked away and brooded until I could work my way around to a friendly version of “rats rump”. I’m also astounded (and I don’t know why I am) that having a black kid in a neighborhood is still a cause for shock and dismay.
Yeah, all types of rude, narrowed minded and mean people still catch me off guard. But when it comes, it makes the hair on my neck stand up!
I would have said, “I’m sorry you feel that way.Thanks for bringing your point to my attention.”
There’s no validity in trying to have a discussion with someone who is that set in their ways. You just have to love them and pray they will one day be reconciled to Him so their hearts will change. I’ve been studying 2 Corinthians 5:14-21 this week. I’m reminded we are not to regard anyone from a worldly viewpoint. WE are the message of reconciliation. WE are Christ’s ambassadors. To love like Him is the only way to respond when faced with this kind of neighborly adversity.
Interesting post. Thanks for sharing. Happy Thursday!
True. Honestly, when dealing with people like that, I have the most difficulty in responding like Jesus. I’m more inclined to flog them into the Kingdom
I woud have asked if he needed a part time job as a valet driver.
I live in the country. My dad had pines planted around the edge of his fields as wind breaks. Some of them started dying out last summer, so he cut them all down. You wouldn’t believe the number of neighbors that came to let him know he destroyed the look of the community by cutting down HIS trees. Just to say, there’s one in every bunch. Hope they get to know you better so they’ll know how wonderful you are.
Thanks Jenn, I actually told them would love to have them over for dinner. The invite was ignored.
what do you tell us…..dont quit inviting!!! even if they dont really want to come keep asking (they may even finally say yes just because they figure you wont stop asking until they do).
Perhaps you should take a page from the Jeff Foxworthy playbook and inform your neighbor that criminals will assume that with all those cars you are a redneck. Rednecks own guns, therefore it is foolish to commit crime in a redneck neighborhood. So by having all those cars, you are deterring crime.
Ha, didn’t think about that Mark. You have a great gift of putting a positive spin on a bad turn. Thanks!
I would have told them to come visit Cornerstone. My Lord, they would pass straight out in there….double whammy…cars and blacks! Then what would make it worse, they’d see all ethnicities just loving & enjoying each other. But on a more serious note, this is just really sad. I feel sorry for them. You would think that in 2012, this type of attitude would not be so prevalent. But we had issues in our neighborhood as well. We were actually told that “….we want to make sure that no one is coming into the neighborhood picking things like a green or blue roof….” We were told that “…our neighborhood has always been quiet…” Someone actually called to purchase our land from us before we built. I had gotten so fed up by that time that I was just about willing to sell it to them. So for people like that, tell them there are plenty FOR SALE signs up on homes all around our city, yall are more than welcome to move….but we ain’ goin nowhere!!!
You go girl. Neither are we. We know God gave us this new home just for us. If they don’t like us being here, they have 2-Choices… Move or die!
New wine vs. old wine skin – my money’s on the new wine
Agreed! Thanks Paul
I don’t really know if I could have contained myself. I have dealt with some of the same issues in malls with my son, who is black, (I’m white) and I have found that just because I belong to God lock stock and barrel, I can’t fix stupid. When dealing with those folks I have a tendency to “brush the dust off my sandals” and let ‘em know they can’t be fixed.
Yeah, I was showing great restraint. I failed to mention he cussed at my son!
“Look beyond their ignorance, and see their need.” Artie Davis (I think)
So sorry you had to have that happen in your new neighborhood. You all are a great family and they will see that for themselves soon enough.
Not trying to go all old school on y’all but the Bible says ‘touch not my anointed’. Your family is definitely anointed of God so I would say your neighbor just spoke curses on his household
Agreed!
Wow. I think I would have said, “just wait until they deliver my other three cars – I’m fixin’em up!” Then… walk away. The us versus them thing tends to burn up the Creator of all this diversity.
Fo Sho Bro! But my Daddy can beat up their daddy!
It’s just embarrassing that it’s still an issue around here – or anywhere.